Well here we are again my people! In the last post I said I would be writing a practical list for how I look at thoughts that seem unacceptable, so that I can get some emotional healing.
I believe that any of us, no matter what kind of life we have lived up to this point, can learn to love and let go of unwanted thoughts and emotions. That way we can give ourselves the love we need to be in the moment. Here is my list of practical tips to help me let go and stay in my love, even when times feel rough.
1. I Remind Myself that my thoughts and emotions are not necessarily reality. – This can be a difficult thing to grasp (especially when emotions are on high alert). It is also a freeing reality once this is grasped. When emotions are running high it can be easy to feel like the busy thoughts that feel like they are out of my control ARE reality. Getting myself to realize that these are just thoughts from hurting emotions can take a lot of the fear away. It seems to me that fear, whether it is fear of a real or imagined event, is simply my bodies way of trying to get me to protect it. This is all well and good when there is an actual threat. But it is not so necessary when there is no immediate danger.
2. I Simply Tell the Thought I love you. – I find it a little strange how effective it can be to tell my thoughts that I love them. Saying I love you, to anything, can help put me put my guard down. It is no different when I say this to my thoughts, no matter how unsafe the thought seems like it is making me. Saying I love you to the thought helps me see through it, so that I can get some healing for the emotion I am feeling.
3. I Just Breathe and don’t actively think at all- When I am feeling overwhelmed at times, even saying I love you to my thoughts can start a cascade of thinking that I feel I can’t accept. At these times I drop the thinking as much as I can. If I just focus on something real like my breathing, or the surface I’m sitting on, then I may be able to calm myself down. At that point there is most often a surrender to feeling what I need to feel.
4. I Talk to Someone I Trust- I am kind of a take care of my emotions on my own kind of guy. Call me stubborn or call me whatever, but the case still stands. But maybe there is a feeling that meditation just isn’t feeling like it is working for. In this case I can always give a friend a call or a text, or chat with my wife. I can use them to help me calm down. Maybe they can help remind me that I am a good person, or that the danger I am perceiving is not real. They may even be able to help me figure out what I am holding myself back from doing, and help me out of the feeling of craziness.
5. Take a Small Step in Taking Care of an Errand- Getting behind on what I need to take care of is big cause of emotional turmoil. Sometimes the list of errands seems so daunting and I get stuck in feeling like it all needs to be done right now. So, first it helps me to do a small to-do list. Nothing big, just enough to help me get started on doing at least something! Fear is a sign-post telling me what I might need to prepare for. It is a great signal telling me to get my butt in gear. Taking care of something I may have been procrastinating on helps ease this fear.
These are the habits I have developed to stay grounded in my love so that I can be my best possible self. It helps keep me in my right mind and helps me in touch with my emotions. My hope is that this list can help you find similar results! If, you have any questions about anything that I have mentioned in this blog post please leave a comment below and I will be sure to respond! Also, if you feel that this information could be helpful to someone you know, feel free to pass it along!